BoxScore from 12/22/19

Old Dogs


Other than being the title of a 2009 film that was so horrible it got a whopping 5% on Rotten Tomatoes, it is an apropos title for this week of terrible, terrible Saugus Hockey.
At first, we were treated to the rare Lenny sighting – not that Lenny – the other Lenny…insert classic Bob NewHart joke here… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ApHgZ96H0PU



Kinda seemed like there was new life growing again in Saugus. Last week we had some new blood and this week some old ghosts came back to life. And then they died.
War is H-E-double hockey sticks! People were dying out there on the battlefield; The first Lenny went down hard with a muscle pull. There were bound to be casualties. The other Lenny, proudly played on a third game and suddenly had all the confidence of John Sedgwick during the Civil war. He stood tall, noted that they were gunning for him, but with his ironic last words, uttered: “They couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist—"
And down goes Lenny2. Two hours, two Lennys, too bad. It was a Lenny Massacre. But they’ll be back next week. They’re not going down like that, right?


So what about the games? Well, I got sent a telegram from PPP – The Professor. You guys remember him, right? He had some game analysis that he has for us after consulting with the Scout, BigBoard, WPR, and the Real Deal. All of which remain anonymous to this day.

Here’s what he said:
“The dynamic of Billy, Jared, Brendon and Nick was working too well last night. They easily could have had 4-5 more goals if they didn’t miss the net or shoot directly into Steve’s pads a couple of times…tsk, tsk, what could have been. They’re too dangerous to keep together. Watch for Johnny to break that up next week by bribing Jared to get his Binky back. Johnny would like to get Nick and Billy back on D for his team because, frankly, it was just embarrassing at times. You’re gonna let Frendon just waltz in there and roof it on Steve uncontested? Come on. And some of those one-timers the white team missed – I mean, let’s face it, that wasn’t good defense, that was just a missed opportunity and the dark team got very lucky more than once.

On the plus side for the dark team, I thought Steve played great. He stole a couple of would-be goals and when you’re getting peppered with shots like that, you shouldn’t be faulted for giving up as much as he did. I know the lack of subs towards the end of the night definitely affected everyone….but some plays weren’t about stamina. They were about willpower and grit and hustle. Even if hustle means not necessarily moving your legs but means back-checking by stick-lifting their shot attempts.

This week showed us what a potential Haverhill Cup team might look like come redraft time. But here at Saugus, we’re clearly Sadists, so that’s not going to keep happening. Next week, look for the old blind stick throw from the center pile. That’s how we used to do it back in the Milk Street park. Back when everyone was equally young and equally awful. Not anymore. Sometimes it’s true what they say: You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. We’re all old dogs now. Even Nick :-D”

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DATE: 12/22/19

rank	Player	Goals	Assists	Points	Games	Wins	GW	GWA	Team Goals	GA
1	Jared	9	2	11	4	3	1	0	17	12
2	Billy T	1	6	7	4	3	0	1	17	12
3	Andrew	4	3	7	4	1	1	0	12	17
4	Nick	3	3	6	4	3	1	1	17	12
5	Drew B	4	2	6	4	1	0	0	12	17
6	Brendon	4	1	5	4	3	1	0	17	12
7	John R	2	1	3	4	1	0	0	12	17
8	Lenny D	1	1	2	4	1	0	0	11	12
9	Joe	1	0	1	4	1	0	0	12	17
10	MVW	0	1	1	4	1	0	0	12	17
11	Chris Y	0	1	1	4	3	0	0	17	12
12	Lenny Y	0	0	0	4	2	0	0	10	6

rank	Goalie	Games	Wins	Win %	GA	GAA	Shutouts
1	Dave	4	3	75.00%	12	3.00	0
2	Steve F	4	1	25.00%	17	4.25	0

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